I grew up thinking that in order to become more resilient, to become stronger and more able, you had to overcome external obstacles, the things that lay across your path.
I've been trying for years to figure out what I enjoy doing; it's been superceded by all the "shoulds" that have piled up over the years. Hiking is up there, though, so I'm going to head out into the sun-soaked foothills of the rockies right now, before another should pops up. Reading fiction, which I haven't done in decades, and spending relaxed time by myself (does that sound sad?) Also feel like luxurious treats after decades of reading work-related non-fiction (to better my professional prospects :-) ) and raising my children.
Attending ACA for the past 4 years (a 12-step meeting for children of alcoholic and/or dysfunctional families) has opened my eyes to the inner hurdles I have erected over the decades to keep myself safe. These include: thinking I need to look a certain way (slim, pretty, healthy, younger than my age), working too much (being single in America in these inflationary times isn't helping) and taking care of others whose needs apparently are more important than my own. Weekly ACA meetings, therapy and daily mindfulness practice have helped me identify, and slowly overcome my hurdles and reconnect with the joyful, hopeful person I once was, but the work continues...
Lovely to reconnect with you here, Helen. Sending lots of love and hugs your way.
Such a great piece Helen. It’s a very slow process, but I’m working on laying down some of my own hurdles, and am watching friends do the same. Hardest part for me is seeing them in the first place
ha! don't ponder too long, just go do it!
I've been trying for years to figure out what I enjoy doing; it's been superceded by all the "shoulds" that have piled up over the years. Hiking is up there, though, so I'm going to head out into the sun-soaked foothills of the rockies right now, before another should pops up. Reading fiction, which I haven't done in decades, and spending relaxed time by myself (does that sound sad?) Also feel like luxurious treats after decades of reading work-related non-fiction (to better my professional prospects :-) ) and raising my children.
Attending ACA for the past 4 years (a 12-step meeting for children of alcoholic and/or dysfunctional families) has opened my eyes to the inner hurdles I have erected over the decades to keep myself safe. These include: thinking I need to look a certain way (slim, pretty, healthy, younger than my age), working too much (being single in America in these inflationary times isn't helping) and taking care of others whose needs apparently are more important than my own. Weekly ACA meetings, therapy and daily mindfulness practice have helped me identify, and slowly overcome my hurdles and reconnect with the joyful, hopeful person I once was, but the work continues...
Lovely to reconnect with you here, Helen. Sending lots of love and hugs your way.
my hunch is that we feel them before we see them...thanks for reading, xh
Such a great piece Helen. It’s a very slow process, but I’m working on laying down some of my own hurdles, and am watching friends do the same. Hardest part for me is seeing them in the first place
love this, hope you'll share your experience here.
now to ponder what my response would be should the question ever be asked of me.